Winter 2025

T he holiday season is upon us. A time for “good tidings of comfort and joy” followed by new year’s resolutions of rigorous physi- cal rehabilitation full of considerably less comfort and joy. But before the painful promises, the holiday season itself can be a time of anxiety, discomfort and dare I say, dread. Particularly when we are encouraged and even obligated to celebrate the true seasonal spirit of debt-defying holiday shop- ping! Not much comfort or joy when thoughtful gifts arrive from friends and business associates that are no longer on your list. But, you’re still on their list! Ooops. And let’s not forget surprise visitors from across the country full of “Joy to the World” while reminding you of their die-hard political persuasion and doing deep diligence on yours. A “Silent Night” nowhere in sight when extend- ed frenemy family come to town. The good news in all the above is that you are not alone. No, not an emergency cocktail with a retired psychiatrist friend who, after two drinks, always tells you the same thing: “Keep it to yourself. And get over it!” No need to panic. Salvation is close at hand! (Actually closer to your feet.) More than a hun- dred years ago, Josh Billings said, “A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.” Hallelujah! Truly, your beloved pooch is your salvation. No need for a PhD, PsyD or LPCC because you already have your in-house FBT (fur-baby therapist!). “I’m a lot less cranky when it’s just me and my dog,” says Bob Peterson. Amen! Could be because dogs never talk about themselves. Ever hear your pooch YAP about their wonderful- ness? Not happening. We talk. They listen. As Emily Dickinson wrote, “Dogs are better than human beings because they know but do not tell.” So we vent. But our words are far less important than our tone (our emotional energy behind the words that reveal every- thing about us).We can speak openly and honestly about any- thing that keeps us awake at night.We can rant and rave. Cry our hearts out. Our FBT will never lick, kiss and tell. My Winifred listens without judgement. She is not a lie detector machine with a graph recording every duplicitous thing I might utter. No need to hide behind words that skate around what I really feel and want to say to another human. I can hear how they sound out loud. Not talking to myself, but sharing with someone I trust. Do my musings make as much sense out loud as they do in my head? Or once released into the ether of reality, and Winifred’s eager ears, do I realize the waste of breath and brain cells? Isn’t that the point of most human-to-human therapy? A safe place to set free all the stuff festering a continuous loop inside your noggin. Except, with your fur-baby therapist, you are never going to hear, “And how does that make you feel?” So why not unburden your heart, your very soul, in the safest environment. That said, don’t abuse the time with your FBT. It’s the holidays. Give them some time off from listening to you, or they just might bark, “Your 50 minutes are up!” It could be worse. A couple of weeks ago I was considering a different idea for this winter issue. I was wrestling with whether or not to include a very personal emotional experi- ence in the column. Indecision at the crossroads, I glanced at Winifred and muttered,“What do you think?” She gave me her infamous stink-eye, “Keep it to yourself. And get over it!” I did.Which is why you got this column. Winifred and I wish you all the comfort and joy you can squeeze out of every moment this holiday season… and beyond! A screenwriter and best-selling golf humorist in a previous life, Mark Oman forsook his golf addiction and took up with Winifred, co-author of their screenplay, “Murder, Misfits and Mutts!” Mark and Winnie live in Carmel with four-legged little sister, Molly, and two-legged wife, Barbara. Contact Winifred (or Mark) at: mark@markoman.com . DOG TALES M A R K O M A N But our words are far less impor tant than our tone, our emotional energy behind the words that reveal everything about us. Good Tidings of Comfort & Joy 56 C A R M E L M A G A Z I N E • W I N T E R 2 0 2 5